Nick (Jesse Eisenberg) is a pizza delivery guy. Dwayne (Danny McBride) needs money to order a hit on his father and thus come into much, much money. Hence, Dawyne orders a pizza, straps a bomb to Nick and tells him to collect $100 large before the timer goes off.
30 Minutes or Less feels unfinished, not unlike a pizza rushed out of the oven too early so it gets to your door on time. Ah, did you see what I did there? This movie feels like clay or, well, pizza dough. Ok, I’ll stop with the lame similes. There might have been a good idea here — director of Zombieland Ruben Fleischer scored big making fun of the apocalypse, how hard could it be to find the humor in abduction? Or suicide bombing? Or bank robbery? Or contract killing? Do you see the big issue here? It’s a “ride off into the sunset wearing a smile and playing a tune” movie where such just isn’t possible. “Phew. Glad that’s over. Isn’t it great not to be kidnapped or wear a bomb or have to rob a bank or kill a guy? And hey, let’s keep the bank robbery money. I think we earned it.” Nice to pretend this movie doesn’t need an epilogue in which every character goes to jail for a while.
I see you, Jesse Eisenberg. Yes, you’re not Michael Cera. I get that. Yes, you’re actually better than Michael Cera and deserving of your Oscar nod. I get that too. You know what? You still lack the one thing that Michael Cera can do in his sleep – be likeable on film. You always come off a tad too self righteous or emotionally awkward. In a movie like this, we have to root for you. We want to root for you. A bomb has been strapped to you. It wasn’t your fault. Now you have to do things you don’t want to do. That’s a heckuva dilemma. We want to sympathize with your plight. Give us a moment, any moment, that makes us the audience connect with you. Are you a jerk or a friend? Do you have an ounce of integrity or work ethic? Hard to tell.
Mostly 30 Minutes or Less reminded me how hard it is to follow a surprise hit with another. We saw the same thing in Due Date last year – very similar film. Vaguely enjoyable characters, mildly funny set-ups, no real payoff and a challenge to connect with your viewers. Screw it, just make Zombieland II next time. Worked for Todd Phillips (Hangover, Due Date, Hangover II), didn’t it? Well … no.
Rated R, 83 Minutes
D: Ruben Fleischer
W: Michael Diliberti & Matthew Sullivan
Genre: Bungled caper
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Pizza delivery guys
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: People who think contract murder isn’t actually funny
