At the end of Act II, Ren (the unfortunately named Kenny Wormald) finally kisses town hussy Ariel (Julianne Hough). The sun is setting and his chin dips to meet hers. As they touch lips, his jaw extends to a point while their necks arch and chests meet below (wait a sec, I’m getting there). The medium profile shot shows the silhouette of the pair with the last rays of sunlight illuminating the heart-shaped negative space between them. Awwwww, ain’t that cute? For this one moment, somebody [read: director Craig Brewer] actually tried to make art and not just retread another tired scene from the original Footloose.
Footloose, er I should say Footloose 2011, actually opens with Bomont (Beaumont? No! That’s something else entirely) kids all a-frenzy to Kenny Loggins’ orginal version of the title song. It is unclear whether there are drugs or alcohol involved when five of them hop in a car and find their death before the opening titles. See, now I’m bothered here. Not-so-reckless kids dying in a fiery car-crash? No, that can happen. But 21st Century teens getting down to 80s Kenny Loggins? C’mon. Kenny wrote a lot of music for movies, but even at the time the only one really into it was the gopher puppet from Caddyshack.
Regretfully, the town hall ignores the specific Loggins involvement in the tragedy and chooses instead to assign a reactionary series of blue laws including no music or dance ever. Next scene is three years in the future with the arrival of Ren.
“Honey, the town rebel we ordered is here!”
“You mean the guy we’re going to treat with muted hostility until we concede that his mild expression of personal freedom exposes the collective paranoia stifling our community?”
“That’s the one.”
“Great, I’ll go get the cops.”
Ok, we got a premise and a protagonist. Gentlemen, start you rehash!
And rehash it is. Ren gets pushed around, makes some friends, and then petitions for dancing to be legal. It’s not curing cancer, but I kinda like that. Not every movie needs to be about something universally important – just important to our hero. And then the playbook gets raided ugly: the sloppy romance, the “chicken” scene (upgraded to school buses), the hussy’s father is the town preacher/villain. Heck, the “teaching the awkward friend to dance” scene could be lifted exactly from the Kevin Bacon experience. It’s even set to Deniece Williams’ “Let’s Hear It for the Boy.” The soundtrack for the 1984 Footloose was the best part of that film, of course. The 2011 producers recognized this and capitalized by making sure to get the same soundtrack as they had in 1984. Yeah, that’ll work. Teens just loooooove oldies.
Line dancing aside, and it’s important to mention the four (4) separate scenes of this unspeakable evil, the hoofing in Footloose is pretty good. Now I’m confused: why do the Bomont teens know how to dance? Dancing has been illegal for three years. I understand rebellion and all, but it seems to me the more oppressive the society, the likelier rebellion will be measured in quantity, not quality. This is like getting a killer wet t-shirt contest sponsored by Saudi Arabia. OK, well, whatever. Truth is that if you can suspend disbelief and go in with an open mind, you might just enjoy … the original Footloose with Kevin Bacon. Ignore this one; rent that one.
Rated PG-13, 113 Minutes
D: Craig Brewer
W: Dean Pitchford and Craig Brewer
Genre: Unnecessary remake
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Girlfriends of self-conscious boys
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Their boyfriends
