Would you change your partner? Not could, would. Are there things about your partner you don’t prefer? I suppose that’s a bit of a no-brainer. I’ve been married 19 years; if my wife is 100% satisfied with me, I’m Tom Cruise. And even then, I’m pretty sure Katie wasn’t 100% satisfied with him. For one thing, I think my wife is less than a fan of my cinematic volume intake. Go figure.
Calvin Weir-Fields (Paul Dano) is a writer. He solves writer’s block by detailing a recurring dream babe in print. And then one day, she’s there in the flesh, the girl he’s dreamed about. Yeah, I’d freak out, too. Ruby Sparks (Zoe Kazan) is the dream red-head in question; Zoe also wrote the screenplay, which I’d be critical of, ego-wise, if she were a name. As is, I’ll let it slide. The creation is existential quandary #1. On what level does Ruby actually exist as a separate entity? Is this an immaculate conception of sorts? Ruby is a product of Calvin’s mind, right? If he has sex with Ruby, is that just some advanced form of masturbation? Incest? There’s a whole bunch that’s worth discussion here and we’re just getting started.
Calvin’s brother Harry (Chris Messina) gets in on the joke and insists they try an experiment. What if Calvin writes more about Ruby? Can that come true, too? Uh oh. Naturally, Calvin takes the route with appeal to every 
teen boy on the planet – the creation of a sycophantic sex machine as your “other.” Some men never grow out of this fantasy; I imagine they lead very, very angry lives. Fear the ones with money.
Calvin’s biggest problem is he comes across as somebody you wouldn’t date on a dare. He’s an odd combination of indecisive, ill-dressed weasel but fiercely aggressive when a perceived threat is near. I’d peg this guy as a wife-beater if he had a wife. Hence, it’s only a matter of time before Ruby senses greener pastures. And what do you do when your alter ego finds you dull? I found this dynamic fascinating – it wasn’t just that Calvin found fault with his own creation; it’s that his creation finds fault with Calvin. And there’s no question that Ruby grows apart. It’s like Batman telling Bruce Wayne to “get bent.”
So you have a perfect girlfriend of your own invention who suddenly finds you imperfect. BUT you can make her do anything you want. Not just do, behave any way you want, too. It smacks of religious dogma, no? The “subjugation of women” and all, etc., etc. What do you do? And how much of an adult are you? No married person has ever been 100% satisfied … but what would you change if you could? And what is easier, changing your partner to match your needs, changing yourself to match your partner’s needs, or something in between?
Ruby Sparks immediately leaps to the top-5 list on my year. Thoughtful, deep, occasionally very funny and a statement about what it is to live as a social being – congrats to Zoe Kazan; if I could control you to write more, I would.
Once a writer invented his Ruby
She got along great for a newbie
Does this gem exist?
What might have I missed?
Redefining “To be or not to be.”
Rated R, 104 Minutes
D: Jonathan Dayton, Valerie Faris
W: Zoe Kazan
Genre: Existential
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Couples open to marriage counseling
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Power brokers
