Like a malignant fungus, Kevin Hart is starting to grow on me. I kid! I kid! I kid because I love? No, like, maybe? Sorta. Here – I kid because I’m mildly appreciative. I am mildly appreciative of Kevin Hart. And because Kevin Hart has a great sense of humor, I know he’ll accept that. I think Kevin’s project choices have improved considerably of late and he is a legitimately funny man, though you’d never know from Think Like a Man Too.
The newest call to comedic arms sets Kevin Hart a-battle with Will Ferrell with one headed to big bad prison. In the 70s, this probably would have been a Blaxploitation film with Hart as the future pin-cushion and Ferrell as his parole officer. Here, it’s Ferrell as the future inductee to the penal system for the same crap that broke the country in 2007.
In short, James (Ferrell) is a wealthy and mostly oblivious prick accused of c
ookbookery and sentenced to serve time in a not candy-ass white collar prison. The colorful iterations of his stages of grief create the stage as Will transforms from 1%er to a guy who needs help to survive San Quentin. Enter the local garage owner, Darnell (Hart), who agrees to assist James’ attempt to Get Hard for the $30k tag Darnell needs to get his family into a better neighborhood. The joke is that Darnell has never been to prison and knows less than we do about it. And yet, James’ mansion is molded into a reasonable prison – he sleeps on a cot in the wine cellar (his cell) with a bucket for his business; the tennis court is “The Yard,” where he gets 30 minutes of outdoor time a day; he has to wait in line behind the play-acting servants to make a phone call. Darnell introduces a number of scenarios intended to strengthen James’ resolve. They won’t work, of course, but the moments have merit.
As with any Ferrell film, there is humor – he’s arrested while sharing a duet of “Daughters” with John Mayer, in fact right after he asks Mayer to hold back cuz he’s gonna carry it for a bit. And while the criminal transformation hardly makes me fear James, I did enjoy the sense of paranoia he adopts in the process, which is unfortunately on display when Darnell introduceshis family to James. Film fans will enjoy the “how did you go to prison, Darnell?” story.
I swear this film was about a half–step away from making an actual honest-to-God political statement. It comes soooooo freaking close, but begs off. Boo. Ferrell is innocent, of course, a movie-ism I never tire of. Look, I’m just spit-ballin’ here, but what if he isn’t innocent? This seven-figure popinjay isn’t especially well-liked. His servants hate him (think the gratuitous morning displays of his junk have anything to do with that?), his coworkers mostly kiss his ass and his fiancée (Alison Brie – she has no 
real role here, but I do so enjoy Alison Brie; maybe I’ll find her picture for this review) drops him like an undercover Inspector Clouseau handling dishes at Chevy’s. His pre-training snobby attitude towards Darnell makes it quite clear his politics lean much more to the side of the “Get a job, hippie” side of the spectrum. Wouldn’t it be nice if he got a comeuppance to justify the demeaning attitudes he demonstrates early on? Wouldn’t that make a statement about the as-yet-unpenalized Wall Street douchebags who created the financial crisis? We can hate them and allow them redemption in the same span. Or we can just, you know, hate them.
Without the statement, this film is just an excuse for a Ferrell-Hart comic-off. Meh, I can do worse. Nobody’s going to prison over this.
If you’re ever shanghaied by a glitch
And find yourself in a position which
Leaves you in jail
For smoother sail
Try to make Kevin Hart your bitch
Rated R, 100 Minutes
D: Etan Cohen (Are you serious? Like “Ethan Coen,” only not? Is this like Señor Spielbergo?)
W: Jay Martel, Ian Roberts, and Etan Cohen
Genre: The lighter side of sodomy
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Prison enthusiasts
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Actual convicts, I imagine
