If movies have taught me anything, it’s that every single male person of Italian descent living within 25 miles of Manhattan during the 20th Century was a criminal. Yup, every single one. Kid Frankie Valli was a mob pawn? Of course he was. Note to self: if ever playing lookout guy during a heist, pick something other than singing “Silhouettes” as your personal “cheese it, the fuzz!” You look like an idiot.
I remember seeing an HBO concert for Season-less Frankie Valli in the 70s (maybe he’d moved to California ;) ). As he crooned and leaned down over the crowd to accept flowers, panties and court summons, I remember wondering where his band was. I was pretty sure he had a band. I had no idea he’d pledged his career to cleaning up the debt left by group founder Tommy DeVito (Professional Dermot Mulroney impersonator Vincent Piazza). If nothing else, at least now I have closure.
If I can go back to the mob thing again – it’s hard to know how deep into the mob Frankie was. If you take the movie at face value, everybody in the neighborhood knew the guy had the voice of an angel — a falsetto angel, I assume. Crime boss Gyp DeCarlo (Christopher Walken) makes no bones that Frankie is not to be soiled by any mob business, and Gyp will always remain Frankie’s protector, all because the guy can sing. That said, Gyp kinda gypped on the auspices – Frankie only finds a band when his friends get out of jail long enough to have a gig.
One of the huge problems with Jersey Boys is I could never tell what year it is. The movie opens in 1951, where 39-year-old John Lloyd Young is supposed to be 16-year-old Frankie something-ridiculously-Italian (later changed to “Vally,” later still changed to “Valli,” where it stayed in a holding pattern). The passage of time in the film seems exclusively marked by how much facial hair has been artificially pasted onto Erich Bergen‘s chin. On a rare occasion, Frankie comes back from Hollywood and we see a set of daughters old enough to have opinions. Frank looks the same as he did when the film began, so I can only guess we’re at least 10 to 15 years beyond that, but who knows? Jersey Boys had the audacity to show flashbacks. Really, fellas? The chronology is important because I have no idea when The Four Seasons split and Frankie assumes all Tommy’s debt. Does he do this at age 25? Age 40? How long have they been on tour? It makes a difference when we examine Fran
kie as a family man.
I’ve never seen Jersey Boys the musical. I’m told it’s quite good. The movie isn’t. It has some moments. The synthesis of the talent when Frankie meets writer Bob Gaudio (Bergen) culminates in the wonderful, “Cry for Me.” I love the thought that musicians can blend instantly upon hearing a song for the first time or are talented enough to look at a sheet of paper and tell if it’s a hit. The inspiration for “Big Girls Don’t Cry” from the fellas watching Billy Wilder’s Ace in the Hole is fun, too. Oh, and dig the cutaway of Director Clint Eastwood in “Rawhide.” On the other hand, the acting is way over the top (especially from Mike Doyle, who sought to singlehandedly attempts to reinvent post-war homosexuality) and the choice to let the story ride on the slimiest of the Boys, DeVito, was an unforgivable error.
Frankie Valli is an American icon. While singing has been considered effeminate since long before I was born, that stereotype has faded considerably in the past few decades. However, it was very strong in the 50s and 60s, and –let’s face it—Frankie is a wonderful crooner, but his bread and butter was being the premier falsetto in the biz. If you don’t respect singing, you’ll respect even less a boy showin’ off his “girl voice.” I think it was big of the mob to show such openness on the issue.
♪Frankie
Frankie baby
Frankie
Frankie baby
Fra-aa-aa-a-a-an-kie bay-yay-be
Frankie
You’re 39. ♫
Rated R, 134 Minutes
D: Clint Eastwood
W: Marshall Brickman & Rick Elice
Genre: Cashing in on a popular musical
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: If he still lives, crime boss Gyp DeCarlo
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Disappointed fans of the musical
♪ Parody inspired by “Sherry”
