Buddha wouldn’t be holding a gun to somebody’s head. I’m no historian, but this seems a tad inaccurate. I kid, of course. Sure, Buddha would definitely take hostages at gunpoint – he’d probably blow a guy away while saying, “No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” — not unlike Caine in “Kung Fu,” I imagine.
Chongqing Hot Pot opens with a masked banked robbery. One of the bandits dons a Buddha mask; it seemed a tad irreverent, but maybe that’s me. In quick succession, the robbers are trapped by police, but you won’t believe it, there’s a tunnel exit through the bank vault. Glory be, how long has that been there? And why is the money still around?
Turns out the creators of the tunnel were not thieves but restaurateurs. Thanks to WWII, Chongqing is riddled with underground shelters; some of these have been made in restaurants. This particular one was looking for expansion possibilities. It was going out of business and expanding at the same time, which is a neat trick.
Liu Bo (Chen Kun), Xu Dong (Qin Hao), and Four Eyes –am I pronouncing that right, “4 I’z?” (Yu Entai) are childhood friends gone entrepreneurial. Their friendship is stronger than their business, which is both good and bad. Liu Bo is the main focus; his long running losing streak to Mah Jongg sharks (you read that right) is finally taking its toll – his bookie wants the money now. The only way for Liu to escape is to sell the restaurant. That is until –lo and behold!- we dug into a bank. Well, isn’t that conveeeeenient? And wouldn’t you know it? The week you drill hole in the bottom of a vault is the same week somebody robs the place. That seems a tad more than coincidence to me. What about you?
There’s a girl. There’s always a girl. The trio are actually stand-up guys and, believe it or not, try to tell the police what’s up, but the plans are distracted when it just so happens that childhood friend and girl who was always hot for Mr. Sharkbait, Yu
Xiaohui (Bai Baihe), works at the bank. And, check it out, she hates the bank; she’s only too happy to let the fellas in to plaster the hole. Gee, that sounds convenient, too, huh? Now, Liu Bo kinda has to figure out what he wants – his friends, the girl, or the money because he probably can’t have all three.
Now why didn’t the bank itself discover the hole? Seriously, does no one patrol the vault … ever?
The bromance is much better than the romance in Chongqing Hot Pot. The latter seems almost like an afterthought. This is one of those films where there is just a bit too much going on – in a span of maybe 72 hours, there’s the break-in and plot to retile, the collection thugs, the failing restaurant, the robbery, the rivalry between friendship and self-preservation … who’s got time to fall in love? And when you figure that one out, tell me who actually fell in love while you’re at it.
There’s a hole in my heart
It’s nobody’s fault
There’s a matching twin
Within the bank vault
I owe lots of money
It doesn’t come free
Do go on the lam
Or on a crime spree?
And then these three others
Whom can I save?
And what kind of fools
Set up shop in a cave?
Not Rated, 94 Minutes
D: Yang Qing
W: Yang Qing
Genre: Reluctant robbers
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Underground restaurateurs
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Bankers
