Grace Jones always scared me. I was dead certain that if I ever picked up a football while in the presence of her image, she would –from a poster– bull-rush and sack me well before if had a chance to get the throw away. I only realize now that her intimidating appearance was deliberate and based on the child abuse she faced at a young age. This personal delve into the past is rare in a documentary which chose almost exclusively to present Grace Jones as we see her now: still a talented performer, still very beautiful, and still scary from time-to-time.
I went through the entire film wondering what the words “Bloodlight” and “Bami” meant. I never found out. Here are some things I did find out: Grace Jones is into sexy cosplay on stage. As her career predates many singers we associate with selling sex and voice in tandem, I think it’s fair to say Grace has had a strong influence on performers like Madonna and Katy Perry. Perhaps it’s a good thing Jones wasn’t a furry. On stage, Grace Jones usually adorns a black one-piece (geez, woman, do you ever get cold?), a pair of heels as high as the legal limit allows, and headgear one might associate with Halloween. During one stage performance in France, Grace graced the stage with some sort of black chiffon cone that resembled a combination eyemask and time trial cycling helmet. After the warm-up, Ms. Jones complained that the six baby-doll-clad dancers enhancing the performance made her look like a brothel madam, however, I was more concerned at the moment that she was going to attack Sigourney Weaver and plant eggs in her chest cavity.
The song list Grace Jones chooses on stage can be most amusing for a writer like me … early on in the film, she sang “Williams’ Blood,” an autobiographical tune with the lyric: “I don’t wanna keep up, keeping up with the Joneses” and immediately followed that with “Amazing Grace.” By golly, I can’t wait for my own stage show. I think I’ll sing “Magnet and Steel” followed by “Froggy Went a Courtin’.”
One thing that strikes me about Grace is how often she adapts to her audience, on or off stage. It’s not just that the Jamaican-born legend slips in and out of the different languages she speaks; she will literally talk differently depending on the people in her present company. This is very different than the Grace Jones I remember from the 1980s; perhaps it was the sale of her persona, but decades ago she struck me as: “This is me. Take it or leave it.” As much as Grace is constantly caught between feminist and primadonna, I like this about her. She’ll be Grace, but meet you on your terms. How could anyone disagree?
OK, that was the good stuff. Unfortunately, this is a full two hours of movie in a 20-minute package. It’s like spending the entire day being a fly on Grace’s wall. If you love 
and truly love Grace Jones, this is the movie you have always waited for. If you don’t know who Grace Jones is, however, you will wonder, “What am I doing at this film?” I don’t understand why you would make a documentary about a famous person without ever discussing why they were famous … or at least how famous they were once. The historical Amazing Grace is not the picture Sophie Fiennes wanted to show; she wants us to know Grace Jones right now. Songs are neither skimped or edited; thoughts are neither skimped nor edited; cinematography is neither skimped nor edited … at some point, Ms. Fiennes made a decision to film a cloud for a full minute while the movie plays in the background. Sure, why not?
Grace Jones will be 70 this month. She looks fantastic; I’m fond and less scared of 70-year-old Grace Jones. I wish I could give this film a better review; I will say the two stars are definitely for Grace herself, because I have no love to give Sophie Fiennes.
♪Embracing Grace, how sweet I’ve found
Her personality
I once was scared, but now I’m bound
To cite respectfully♫
Not Rated, 115 Minutes
Director: Sophie Fiennes
Writer: _________
Genre: The check-out-my-lingerie tour
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Grace Jones fanatics
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: People who don’t know who Grace Jones is
♪ Parody Inspired by “Amazing Grace”
