What would Jesus do, exactly? I’m pretty sure the Jesus from the bible wouldn’t be a big fan of American faith. That shouldn’t be shocking news. Jesus was big on the love; American Christianity, at this very moment, is big on the hate. Not all of it, of course. There remain millions thousands hundreds, well, a handful of pious American Christians who wouldn’t dream of promoting selfish values over social ones. Pastor Toller (Ethan Hawke) is one such individual; he is, of course, fictional. Crisis of faith tends to be a pre-Trump fad.
The First Reformed is a small church in folksy New York that attracts a pathetically countable number of patrons. Let’s face it, the new fancy church down the block has a better God, knowwhayI’msayin’? Still, the lonely pastor goes through the motions. It’s possible God still likes this place, too. And, hey, anniversary: The First Reformed is celebrating 250 of existence in a few months. So party like it’s 1767, people!
Mary (Amanda Seyfried) and Michael (Philip Ettinger) are having issues. Mary is pregnant and eco-warrior Michael has taken a tack I hadn’t considered: “Let’s abort because the future sucks.” Michael’s extreme pessimism (some might call “realism”) prompts Mary to solicit some chats with their pastor. Instead of the pastor getting Michael to see the beauty of his situation, these talks take a Toller on the man of God, giving rise to his own pessimism, doubts, and personal health concerns. And then two things happen that would turn a normal movie on its prayer beads: First, Mary finds that Michael has hidden a suicide bomber vest in their garage. Second, Michael asks Pastor Toller to meet in the woods, except that when the pastor shows up, Michael is missing a head to self-inflicted gunshot.
Well if you didn’t have a crisis of faith before, try playing it cool when the man you’ve been counseling commits suicide. At its core, First Reformed is essentially a crisis of faith film. Normally a crisis of faith film attacks the church. I wouldn’t say that’s not the 
case here as the film recognizes the hypocrisy of (some) modern faith. Yet, the focus isn’t other-worldly. In fact, it is distinctly this worldly: Pastor Toller takes up Michael’s green party burden and starts asking, “What are we doing to this planet? Does it make any sense?”
I think this is the point at which (I’m told) people start walking out of the film — that is if the very shallow abortion chat hadn’t already chased away a certain audience. It’s sad how little science is understood or appreciated by Americans – especially as our cultural command of science ushered in our superpower status. I wonder if we’ll miss being a superpower by the time we’ve truly “Made America Great Again.” I digress. First Reformed isn’t charming or delightful or funny or any emotion one might associate with the positive end of the scale. It’s kind of like going to a protest where you don’t quite agree with the position being taken, yet you know it’s more right than the opposition – like any gun control rally. That doesn’t make it a bad film, just an uneasy one, and certainly not a movie for everybody … or, perhaps, anybody.
Chicken soup is not this pastor’s broth
His soul is more concerned with God’s wrath
Instead of feinting
Why not take up painting?
And become a man of the drop cloth
Rated R, 113 Minutes
Director: Paul Schrader
Writer: Paul Schrader
Genre: Enlightenment
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Those with a crisis of faith
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: The Koch brothers
