How would you like to meet Idi Amin? Maybe get a big smile and a nice hearty handshake from the notorious Ugandan dictator. Heck, I’d appreciate it -by itself- from the perspective of someone who enjoys crossword puzzles. Seriously, who gets to do that? Who gets a casual random meeting with one of the great villains of history? I mean aside from folks who have golf memberships at Mar-a-Lago, of course. In the summer of 1976, over 200 random citizens on their way to Paris got exactly that when their hijacked plane found its way, instead, to Entebbe, Uganda. There at the tarmac to greet terrorists, hijackees, and AirFrance personnel was Idi Amin himself. It couldn’t have been any more bizarre if the man had then announced, “Welcome to Fantasy Island.”
It used to be that plane hijackings were as common as 
birthday cards from grandma. From what I have read, they didn’t used to be quite as ugly – many terrorists simply wanted to get a Cuban vacation, and we didn’t fear them quite as much as we do now. That being said, there’s little way to sugar coat terrorism. Even if there are no casualties, taking a gun to pilot’s head mid-flight is never a recipe for joy.
That all said, 7 Days in Entebbe is a major exercise in mild with a minor in misdirection. This hijacking coup is notable only for the players involved. Little about it is otherwise notable, and the focus is … a little like wearing plaid to a black & white ball; inappropriate, off-putting, and generally stupid. The two most notable folks in the film are leftist German visionaries Wilfried Böse (Daniel Brühl) and Brigitte Kuhlmann (Rosamund Pike). They’ve undertaken some sort of Marxist plan to even up the Israel battle with Palestine. A small part of me actually feels better about this Pike – the last time she came to Africa to Unite a Kingdom, she got pushed around a bit. Here, she’s got an AK-47. Who’s doing the pushing, now?
With all due respect to Rosamund Pike’s career, this was a bad choice. Once you take the terrorist route, your personal philosophy no longer has a voice at the table. And yet, these jokers and their beliefs are the major story in 7 Days in Entebbe. And they had to be. For the first six days of the hijacking, nothing else happens. Plane gets taken to Uganda. “Hi, Idi. How’s the oppression going?” Give some background to those Germans; that’s what matters here. Back in Israel, Defence Minister (and future Prime Minister) Shimon Peres (Eddie Marsan) and Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin (Lior Ashkenazi) argue over responses. Hey, make sure the audience knows the plane refueled in Benghazi, Libya on its way south; put that word on screen and plenty of assholes will be overjoyed in their nostalgic hatred.
The only other character who gets background in this film is Israeli soldier Yoni Netanyahu (Angel Bonanni), the brother of future Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. Yoni’s girlfriend is non-military setting up a conflict between the two. She is, however, a professional dancer, which allows 
the film to explore snippets of something resembling A Chorus Line during a hostage situation. This culminates in a bizarre piece of editing in which the Israeli siege at Entebbe is interspliced with scenes from a community dance production. You know, normally, I love the juxtaposition of seemingly disparate worlds, but this? What in the Star of David did you have in mind?
It’s easy to be offended by 7 Days in Entebbe: It doesn’t play well to the left or the right. It doesn’t focus on a single hostage. It shows terrorism, but backs away from actual violence. Finally, you can tell this film exists essentially for the names it drops. Personally, I didn’t find it offensive so much as dull; five of the seven days were just laying about in the Entebbe airport waiting for terror to happen. Any seasoned traveler will tell you: the less time you spend at airports, the better off you are.
Yitzhak and Shimon and Idi Amin
Yahu! There’s the bro of Prez Benjamin
This terror unfettered
Is distinctly bettered
With a zealous name-drop bulletin
Rated PG-13, 106 Minutes
Director: José Padilha
Writer: Gregory Burke
Genre: Kinder, gentler terrorists
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Israeli counter-terrorists
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Geez, take your pick – leftists, Israeli citizens, Ugandans, dance troupes
