Check it out … China made a Garry Marshall film. Hold up. Is Garry Marshall really dead, or is he just hiding in China? How would we ever find out?
I don’t know if writer/director Larry Yang qualifies as the Asian Garry Marshall, but see if you recognize this construction: Adoring is not one movie, but six separate upbeat little movies related by only the thinnest of connections. You may recognize this as the plot of Love Actually; I see it more as the Garry Marshall format, because the latter took the Love Actually stuff and completely whittled it down to shallow characters and eye-rolling conflict. Adoring is all about pets and pet owner issues and if you start rolling your eyes during this film, you’ll never get them back where they belong.
The tales of shallow (and you’ll have to bear with me on the descriptions here; I don’t know any of the actors names, and the only sources which would reveal such are not written in a language I read … but I sure as heck can tell you about each plot):
The kitten of doom. Germophobe and everyday dude share a kitten. Germophobe, a comic artist, finds the situation so awful she starts depicting kitten as a terrible beast in her art
Overblown conflict: The horrors of kitten
Ridiculous assumption: That a grown person would fear a kitten
Blind dude. High school student goes blind. Girl that walks him to school has to move away and thus trains his dog, a Golden Retriever named Zha, how to be a guide dog.
Overblown conflict: Blind dude resents girl helping him
Ridiculous assumption: Any dog can be a guide dog if trained properly
The delivery boy and the stray. New delivery boy can’t figure out an apartment complex, but befriends a stray dog who can.
Overblown conflict: There’s a team of gang members (seriously, this is the plot) out to catch the dog (“Barton”) which has, thus far, proved elusive
Ridiculous assumption: (Tie) 1) The delivery boy still needs help navigating the apartment complex after weeks of deliveries. 2) The gang can’t catch a dog in an enclosed setting
The newlyweds and Carl. Woman has a Rottweiler. “Seven” -the Rottweiler- is very protective and will not let woman’s new husband enjoy any reaching into the cookie jar, so-to-speak.
Overblown conflict: That somehow the dog is always able to interrupt nookie time
Ridiculous assumption: That somehow the dog is always able to interrupt nookie time
The estranged man and the cat. A divorced dad is stuck with Hulu, his daughter’s cat. At first, he hates the thing, but when he realizes that’s all he’s got of wife and daughter, he grows fond of Hulu.
Overblown conflict: A man fabricates cat antics either to get rid of the cat or keep his daughter from going to college
Ridiculous assumption: That you can’t just talk this one out
The boy and his pig. Dude owns a pig,”Bell.” His fiancée ain’t a fan. Funny thing is he knows she won’t be a fan. There’s a special pig elevator, awwww, cuz pigs don’t do stairs. There’s also a pig sty which is a children’s rec room. Yeah.
Overblown conflict: It’s me or the pig
Ridiculous assumption: Pigs live like clean children
None of these tales are bad, but none are especially good, either. They speak to a sitcom audience who might find a pet pig the silliest thing they’ve ever seen. To somebody who has seen many sitcoms, the silliest thing about the pig is the fact that it lives in a rec room with pillows and toys … and the endless arrangement of framed photos lining the walls of a boy and his pig. Does a guy living alone need to know he owns a pet pig and loves it? This seems like something straight out of 50 First Dates.
Adoring is amiable family fare, assuming your family doesn’t question much and won’t be confused by a cockblocking Rottweiler. If you don’t think too hard, the film might induce a smile or two.
For many, pets can be just so rewarding
Even when problems spout up according
The latent problem dish
Is the owner’s modern wish
My dog would do something worth recording
Not Rated, 108 Minutes
Director: Larry Yang
Writer: Jianan Ran, Larry Yang
Genre: Things that make you go, “awwwwwww”
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Romantic and simplistic pet owners
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Cynics
