It’s hard to look at Uma Thurman and Tim Roth and not think about Pulp Fiction. Ahhhhh, Pulp Fiction; now THERE was a great film. Wish I were watching that. Yup. I sure do. Look film, I see your odd collection of entertainment relics: Crispin Glover, Maggie Q, Stephen Fry, Parker Posey … that fact that I know all of these people from better films does not make me any happier about this one…in fact, it just makes me think about all the movies I could be watching instead of this one.
The Con Is On begins with a foul-mouthed, coke dealing nun. This is the kind of comedy today’s crime caper goes for. Does the nun have a name? Do we ever see her again? No squared. Instead, we follow the money. Shouldn’t that be the other way around? I mean, in a sick world, I can see a nun dealing coke … but a nun with a drug problem just doesn’t make sense. Dudes are all about the discipline. Maybe she just wanted a coke habit to go with her nun’s habit. It doesn’t matter. Point is, Harry (Thurman) has a gambling problem, immediately squanders the take, putting herself and her partner Peter (Roth) in trouble with their merciless overlord, Irina (Maggie Q).
Without telling any jokes, there is a light and comic feel to The Con is On. While Irina butchers indiscriminately on her path to Harry, Harry and Peter behave as if they’ve let an expiration date elapse on the milk. Taking a drug mule job to put, what?, a downpayment on the sum Harry owes, the couple ventures to El Lay, where Peter suddenly remembers he was married to a pretty woman who is made of money (Alice Eve). The rest of the film is spent on the compound where art film director Gabriel (Glover) has surrounded himself with underwritten characters. Apparently, this is where The Con (was) On. I couldn’t quite tell as other con movies tend to spell out exactly how they’re going to acquire the elusive MacGuffin.
The appeal of this film is supposed to be in how much this couple 1) drinks and 2) takes their very serious plight not seriously. The drinking part isn’t spelled out; the film doesn’t call them alcoholics, and yet, finding a scene in which either one isn’t parting of something alcoholic is quite a challenge. The Con uses alcohol the way black and white noir uses smoking.
The Con is On is the kind of film that makes you truly appreciate Quentin Tarantino; you might even wonder aloud what Uma Thurman’s career looks like without him. I’ll give you a hint – check out the careers of several of her costars here. Parker Posey immediately comes to mind. Don’t know who that is? Blame Quentin Tarantino. What escapes here is the feel of a lot of semi-talented people desperately hoping they’re in a good film. They’re not. You can’t miss a cast attempting humor, but the humor itself is far from “can’t miss.” As is the con.
Trying to guess from what this film shows
What is meant by title do you suppose?
Is it a heist?
Contrary zeitgeist?
Or does “Con” mean these folks are not “Pros?”
Rated R, 90 Minutes
Director: James Oakley
Writer: Alex Michaelides, James Oakley
Genre: Goofy crime
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Is there a Tim Roth fan club?
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Anybody who loved Pulp Fiction
