Is it still an invasion of privacy when the voyeur doesn’t care? Well, yes, of course it is. But aren’t circumstances lessened considerably when the voyeur is just looking for conversational help? I suppose it’s like saying, “Do I still need to pay full price for that Packers-Vikings game if I’m just there for fashion tips?” The answer is still, “Yes,” but I feel bad for you.
Bart (Tye Sheridan) is The Night Clerk at some knockoff Ramada-like chain. Bart is on the spectrum. The film claims he has Asperger syndrome, but I think he’s more of a high-functioning autistic case. It matters little. Bargain bin Rain Man here likes to watch. Specifically, he likes to watch people talk so he can pick up helpful pointers. His current fallback when asked, “How are you?” is “That’s a complicated question,” which made me wonder if I have Asperger’s because that’s exactly what I want to answer whenever asked.
To this end, Bart has set up spy cameras in a specific hotel room to catch unsuspecting humans in unnatural habitats having unprivate conversations.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: aren’t there, quite literally, millions of better places for Bart to learn how humans talk, specifically ones where he’s not committing a felony? Yes. Yes, there are, but so few of them allow for the plot to advance so dramatically.
Putting in his usual nightly class of “English for Pervs,” Bart watches a live murder take place on his personal set. Why exactly did the kid need more than one camera? Heck, why does he need video at all? Never mind. Racing to the scene, Bart arrives just in time to miss the action, but right on time to sully up the crime scene. This gets Detective Espada (John Leguizamo) involved. Look, Tye, you’ve been in enough movies by now to know that you don’t want John Leguizamo showing up; try to rethink that one next time.
Nobody knows what to do with the (probably benevolent) Asperger kid with his finger prints all over the crime scene, so Bart gets transferred across Springfield where he befriends Andrea (Ana de Armas), the only person in the film who speaks to him like a human being.
You would think the high point of a film like this is the murder mystery. I mean, why wouldn’t it be? This is not the case. The best part of The Night Clerk is this odd relationship between the emotionally distant Bart and his sexy new friend. Writer/director Michael Cristofer clearly had these scenes in mind when he wrote the film while at the same time using, I’m guessing, some sort of Magic 8 ball to come up with the ill-fitting and nonsensical conclusion to The Autism Whisperer.
I would have given The Night Clerk a passing grade had I not seen the ending. The plot device of an autistic kid spying on people to learn how to talk is absurd-yet-unique, and I can forgive it because I quite enjoyed the conversations between Sheridan and Armas. Whatever good will was developed in the first three-quarters of film, however, was destroyed in the final 25%. As a result, I’m left wondering specifically and solely about the leads: did Sheridan convince enough people of his range that his roles will get bigger? Probably not. Did Armas follow her sweet ‘n’ simple Knives Out routine with a passable femme fatale? Definitely.
♪Marlene, she was in 109
And she would wear a thong
To show off her tan line
Marlene was in a bit of pain
She opened up her door
To a bad dude one day
Eeeeeemote it up so Bart can see
What’s going on
Pretty sure he’ll keep the tape
Forevermore (evermore)
Gonna be some evidence
Recorded by The Night Clerk
I bet his mom ain’t proud
She knows he’s not allowed
Gonna be a long night
Voyeuring til light
By The Night Clerk
Who needs a legal place
When you can invade space
Like The Night Clerk? ♫
Rated R, 90 Minutes
Director: Michael Cristofer
Writer: Michael Cristofer
Genre: Rear Window for the adolescent and autistic
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: People who skip out ten minutes before it ends
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Writers
♪ Parody Inspired by “Nightshift”
