“Tis an ill wind…” as my mother would say. While 2021 was horrible for pretty much everyone regardless of who they voted for, the year proved a boon for Alex Winter and Arsenio Hall, two names I hadn’t heard since “The Simpsons” was just a segment on “The Tracey Ullman Show.”
Ushered in by a pandemic and a current willingness to greenlight anything, Coming 2 America came to America this March, reviving my favorite game: Guess who’s not dead. Hey, there’s Arsenio and Wesley Snipes and Morgan Freeman and Salt-N-Pepa and –wait a moment- John Amos is still alive? Who knew? Tracy Morgan? Gladys Knight? OMG, it’s Louie Anderson. Surely he died, right? I guess only his career did.
After digging up this semi-valuable collection of ancient relics and getting the green screen super-ready for some demeaning stereotypes, Eddie Murphy was ready to revive his role as Akeem, prince of an African country (Zamunda) that is definitely not Wakanda, but one –not unlike Wakanda- in which everybody is fluent in English and no other language. Straining for a plot to justify a 33 year revival of mediocre comedy, Wakanda-lite (1/3 less calories than your original Wakanda) here is having border trouble and the hawkish General Izzi (Snipes) is threatening war if a political marriage cannot be found.
Akeem has a few fairly cosmetic problems, the highest of which is that there is no male heir to his throne, territory I swear we covered in Aladdin twice already, and Izzi’s most eligible is a vapid CIS she-dragon. But wait! 
It looks like all problems are solved by Zamunda Ex Machina – turns out Akeem sired a son in Queens 30 years ago by accident (?!) Whaddaya know … Zamunda is Coming 2 America again.
If I’m being honest here, this is politically shrewd move. At literally no cost, Akeem avoids war by claiming an illegitimate son. Aside from being stupid, however, there are several real problems with this plot — 1) Akeem immediately leapfrogs a nobody into pole position from illegitimate to legitimate. 2) He ignores and –quite frankly-insults his daughters in the process and 3) new prince Lavelle Junson (Jermaine Fowler) is kind of a zero.
Plot isn’t why this film was made, of course. Coming 2 America is about pageantry and sets and cameos and the glory of reliving a past where two talented actors each play four different characters on screen. There’s only one real hitch to the Eddie & Arsenio reunion tour: they forgot to write jokes. For all the spectacle, Coming 2 America committed the cardinal sin of comedies … it wasn’t funny. I dunno how many years it takes to write decent comedy, but apparently 33 isn’t enough. Oh you can dress up Eddie and Arsenio and let them revive their barbershop alter egos, but without a decent joke, this film is a joke.
Eddie Murphy revives comedy arthritic
And tightropes again the line of anti-Semitic
He’s a barbershop quartet
By himself, you can bet
Too bad he didn’t dress up as a critic
Rated PG-13, 110 Minutes
Director: Craig Brewer
Writer: Kenya Barris and Barry W. Blaustein & David Sheffield
Genre: Reanimating a dead horse, beating it to death
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: People who live for cameos of Gladys Knight
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Fans of humor
