Golly gee, there is just nothing quite so un-sexy as professional sex, huh? I don’t expect you to agree with me. After all, sex worker is a profession that has –shall we say- withstood the test of time. But, wow, does the idea of sex-for-money not do a thing for me … and on film? I swear it looks that much worse. And there we are with Zola, a “true” story with a ton of sex and not an ounce of fun.
Like most stories based on real life, Zola needed some padding; there really wasn’t a lot to this tale—stripper gets new friend and goes to Florida where she’s suddenly in over her head. That’s it. Don’t read more into it – there isn’t anything after “in over her head;” that pretty much describes the scene, the action, the plot, and the rest of the film. There’s a metric ton of joyless exhibitionism and joyless sex in this film which makes me literally embarrassed for the R rating.
Zola (Taylour Paige) is a part-time stripper who waits on Stefani (Riley Keough) at the local feedhouse. Recognizing Zola as a fellow stripper, Stefani immediately befriends Zola and asks her if she’d like to roadtrip to Tampa for some away game stripping. Hold up right there and think about that one. Somebody you’ve never met has just asked you to drive to Florida specifically to strip and you said, “Sure.” Well, I can’t find any flaws in this plan, can you?
So the next day, Stefani shows up in a van with her limpdick boyfriend Derrek (Nicholas Braun), and a stonefaced driver (Colman Domingo) who won’t identify himself. And after whatever passes for “I Spy” in a strippermobile, they finally make it to Florida where the passive driver suddenly has a forceful personality, no sense of humor, and has decided he’s in charge of the sexcapades to follow.
Oh, the other
person in the van is your pimp … and now he’s my pimp, too, even though I’m just a stripper, not a sex worker. Thanks, new friend.
This is the point at which there really ought to be a wrinkle or a plot development or an escalation of sorts as one might find in most films. This film, however, was based on a series of tweets (!) -screw it, remind me to write my next screenplay based on sidewalk graffiti- in effect, that means that the protagonist decided documentation of her fate was more important than combating it. That seems true to real life, but makes for a pretty crappy film.
Zola tried to compensate by adding a little humor in the form of Derrek the idiot boyfriend, which lent itself to a moment or two of dark comedy –like when Derrek decides to commit suicide at the end of the film- but mostly it made me feel sorry for Derrek. It’s pretty clear that – in her own way- Stefani was as abusive to Derrek as Stefani’s pimp was as abusive to Stefani and Zola. Zola is billed as a comedy; please chime in if you think any of that sounded funny in the least. Like most things in Florida, Zola was a bad idea brought to life by people who assume the universe ends at the border to Georgia. Rarely have I wanted to see sex less in a film – which is an absolute shame.
♪Her name was Zola
She was a “show” girl
With a complexion far from fair
And pole dance and a chair
She had a driver
Who wanted action
And when she said “that ain’t my sin”
The guy made sure that she was in
He knew the place she slept
The kid for whom she wept
He knew her work
Where to find her
And the home she kept
And that is Zola
One shitty weekend
“Music” and “passion” and crib they’re all crashin’
Stefani, Zola
Should have gone to NoLa♫
Rated R, 86 Minutes
Director: Janicza Bravo (great name, crappy film)
Writer: Janizca Bravo, Jeremy O. Harris
Genre: The exact opposite of titillation
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: People who respect actors who bare for crappy films
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: People who respect well considered screenplays
♪ Parody Inspired by “Copacabana (At the Copa)”
