A homosexual tailor?! Is there such a thing?! Next you’ll be telling me there are homosexual bakers, designers, and zookeepers. Ah, but here’s the problem: The tailor is Muslim and lives in a Muslim country. Yeah, that will complicate things.
Oh and he’s also married. To a woman.
It doesn’t help that Palestinian actor Saleh Bakri already looks like a 1970s porn star. Actually, he looks a little like Mark Spitz. Halim (Bakri) runs a caftan store in semi-urban Morocco. He is currently sewing together The Blue Caftan, his personal Mona Lisa. It has been pre-paid for by a Moroccan Karen and she stops by every two hours or so to demand her garment.
Mina (Lubna Azabal) may or may not know her husband is a closeted homosexual. She likes to join him at the local hookah bar and root for the other team when the game comes on. We forgive her because she is dying. She seems like a nice woman; we don’t want her to die … but we also don’t want any more friction in this marriage than death might cause, so Halim stays silent.
Silent is a pretty good word for Halim. He’s tall and present, yet stoic and understated, never 
one for big gestures or aggressive actions. It’s a portrait both intimate and exhausting. Sure, he’s gay, but he doesn’t want to display it openly with his apprentice, Youssef (Ayoub Missioui); he’d much rather have an anonymous encounter at the local bath house. He’s quite good at hiding all emotions at all times.
The Blue Caftan is a quiet and dignified experience. This is a picture in which not much happens and body language is oft substituted for dialogue. This is a kind and warm picture, one that leaves you with tears of both joy and pain. It takes a while to get to the heart of this film, yet when does the The Blue Caftan has one of my favorite third acts in all of 2022 cinema. If you can get through the first ninety minutes, I believe the ending is well worth it.
There once was a man named Halim
Who made caftans for both wide and slim
To his wife’s dismay
Turns out that he’s gay
Which explains all those trips to the “gym”
Not Rated, 118 Minutes
Director: Maryam Touzani
Writer: Maryam Touzani
Genre: Making ultra-conservative heads explode
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Progressives
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: “There are no gay Muslims”
