It’s a wonder any of these people ever leaves the house, y’know? If you were associated in any way with the original Woodsboro massacre, it is only a matter of time before person or persons in a “Ghostface” costume systematically slash their way through your friends, family, and acquaintances while targeting you. And there never seems to be an end of these lunatics no matter how many die, huh? The Woodsboro killings have inspired more psychopaths than Donald Trump’s lies about the 2020 election.
This time, the gang finally leaves Woodsboro, which seems like a reasonable move, huh? If the bloodletting is only local, why not move away from it? That seems like a great idea until Ghostface decides on a road trip. In the beginning of this film, an assistant professor of Ghostface-ology or whatever gets tricked into an alley and subsequently murdered by someone in, of course, a Ghostface costume. This is all good and fun until the Ghostface who killed the prof is killed by another Ghostface.
Ok. You have both my attention and my confusion.
Sisters Sam and Tara (Melissa Barrera and Jenna Ortega) have fled their home stabbing grounds for college, Blackmore University in New York City. NYC has the benefit of several Ghostface and pointed-weapon enthusiasts, thus complicating the picture of who is exactly trying to kill Sam and Tara this time.
Oh, and was anybody hoping Jenna Ortega would break out her “Wednesday” routine? That kid is never a victim. No such luck.
Bottom line: murders are happening; everybody is a suspect, even the ones who know the rules. Especially the ones who know the rules … The Scream franchise has lasted because the films haven’t just been about slashing; they often threaten the fourth wall as characters explain in movie dialogue that they are characters in a horror film and horror franchises have rules. Hence, the films have cleverly disguised their bloodlust as an overview and critique of an entire genre of film. I honestly wish other films would do this; after watching Creed III painfully dismiss professionalism as if it were not a thing, I wish there were a boxing franchise that existed only to critique boxing movies –who more than have it comin’.
While Scream VI lacked omnipresent franchise survivor Neve Campbell and killed off David Arquette in Scream V, it compensated for the lack of veterans by going after Gale Weathers (the increasingly angular Courtney Cox), who has been little more than a peripheral player in these films. The film also returned Hayden Panatierre as a cheerleader, er, FBI Agent. The other thing the Scream franchise does better than almost 
any other horror franchise is demographic elasticity. Women killers, women survivors, women agents … people of color (Jasmin Savoy Brown and Mason Gooding) who show up for a sequel! Beat that, Halloween.
Scream VI proved the franchise can still surprise me from time to time. Yeah, the legends are getting far-fetched, as are the scenarios – where exactly does one hide a Ghostface museum in Manhattan, huh? And if you find DNA on Ghostface masks tracing murders to ones that happened years ago, why are you not following the chain of evidence? The costumes associated with police cases … those are under lock and key, right? If they’re removed from an evidence storage facility, there’s a record, no? Or at least a video recording of some kind, right? Tell me you can’t just walk into a random police station and request cold case weaponry like it’s a lending library. And even then, there would still be a clue there somewhere.
I can honestly say I still find this franchise entertaining, but I kinda hope it stops here. In my mind, while I do enjoy the slashing scenarios and the characters trying to defeat the narrative as much as the killer, I want these fictional people to be able to enjoy their lives, if possible. I want them to be in Ghostface farces and Ghostface romcoms. They don’t have to live happily ever after, but I’d sure feel better if people stopped trying to stab them every movie season, y’know?
To defy the standard horror schmaltz
This franchise catalogued the genre’s faults
Then found setting gritty
Moved to New York City
And left bodies from there to New Paltz
Rated R, 122 Minutes
Director: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett
Writer: James Vanderbilt, Guy Busick
Genre: What? This again?
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Slasher fans
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: If you didn’t like the first five Screams, this won’t help
