Haven’t we all wanted to off our oppressive, narcissistic, douchebag partners? Sure. Of course we have. We’ve plotted. We’ve schemed. We’ve selected means. We’ve selected modes. We’ve selected accomplices. For what is your eternal soul worth against a brief amount of freedom, anyway?
Hwang Yeo-rae (Lee Hanee) is a starlet. Yup, a starlet. Not a star. Not a B-lister. A starlet. She got famous with a commercial, turned that into a half-assed singing career, and parlayed the package into a half-assed movie career. Her star turn finally came in the form of the lead in a terrible sci-fi bomb. This was a film so bad that viewers used her catch phrase as a running gag.
Avoiding judgment, Hwang flees to the island of Qualla, wherever that is, only to be oppressed in other forms. She is rescued in comic kung fu fashion by everyman hero Jonathan Na (Lee Sun-kyun). Hwang falls instantly, to her great detriment.
Seven years later, Hwang is thoroughly tired of Jonathan Na. Jonathan has a lovely house filled with giant pictures of himself and rules for his wife, most of which involve not leaving the house for any reason. As Jonathan is a playah, he has a staff to enforce the rules, which includes officious, pedantic, near-identical servants, the “Susans,” and a professional wrestler bodyguard yes-man who simply goes by “Bob.” Hwang loathes Qualla and sees a possible opportunity for freedom upon returning to South Korea.
This ray of sunlight is quickly doused when Jonathan immediately restricts anything Hwang
would find fun, but … wouldn’t you know it? The teenage dork next door is Hwang’s biggest fan. Once he recognizes her, Bum Woo (Gong Myoung) -yes, Bum Woo, the only member of his entire clan without a degree from the University of Seoul- offers to set Hwang free and make both of their dreams all come true.
I should mention now that – if you didn’t quite understand up until this point in the narrative – Killing Romance is a black comedy. The rest of the film involves comic attempts from Hwang and Bum-woo to murder Jonathan Na, an impromptu bean stew eating contest, and a vengeful ostrich. I think this is one of those films in which you’re touched by the comedy consistently or you never are. I enjoyed the comedy here. I enjoyed Jonathan’s over-the-top reactions, intensely competitive nature, and series of disposable mustaches. I think he was a solid villain to overcome. I also enjoyed Hwang’s futility of situation combined with Bum-woo’s futility of person. Hwang’s solicitation is literally like asking your worldly problems to be solved by the nerdy minor next door known only for a comic book collection the size of a small house. Admittedly, Killing Romance ain’t for everyone. It’s very possible you have a moral center or simply find no humor in a fan-club all singing the Heang Yeo-rae anthem and celebrating her with the weird Vulcan-like hand gesture from her bomb of a movie. I, however, enjoyed all these things. You might as well.
There once was a starlet of song
Who knew her marriage shouldn’t last long
So she enlisted a nerd
And planned turd after turd
Finding that two plights can’t free a Hwang
Not Rated, 106 Minutes
Director: Lee Won-suk
Writer: Park Jeong-ye
Genre: Nerd in love
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Those with a taste for hyperbole
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: You probably don’t want to root for a would-be murderer
