At some point, you gotta give it up for Werner Herzog. One day, the man wakes up and says: “I want to make a documentary about Antarctica.” The next, he decides on a sequel to Bad Lieutenant set in New Orleans and starring Nicolas Cage. Who does that? Herzog’s curiosity as a film maker never seems impeded by scope, studio or lack of audience.
Speaking of lack of audience, Werner made Cave of Forgotten Dreams, a documentary about the oldest discovered cave paintings. These paintings were unearthed by accident in the middle of France a few years ago and the area is now sealed to just about everybody. We’re lucky to get a look, I think. It’s not often that a film is geared towards anthropologists. You might even say this profession has been ignored by filmmakers; is it fair to say, “nobody makes a movie with anthropologists in mind?” Well, unless you count Vin Diesel films. And indeed, I 
suspect ninety minutes of documentary cave footage will try the patience of most people, including me. This film is dull as dirt. Correction. This film is dull a stone with a dirt imprint of a horse.
Say, did these guys ever paint anything other than, you know, a horse or a bear? No? God touching Adam? No? Very pretty man-woman? No? How about an optical illusion where it looks like water is flowing uphill? No? Rats. Cave rats.
And yet Cave of Forgotten Dreams represents, most probably, the best argument for 3D to date. Did I not mention the 3D part? Weeeeeeeeelllll, let me tell you just what gets the 3D treatment these days. “Why?” you ask, “why would you make a documentary about cave art in 3D?” That’s exactly what I asked myself. But the results show something undeniable – inside the cave there are only limited light sources. Natural light is all but impossible, so we have portable lamps and flashlights to compensate. It becomes easy to imagine how an earlier version of man saw these figures as he drew them – wild, free flowing, illuminated only by torchlight. And the 3D effect mirrors torchlight much better than any sun or high wattage set of bulbs could do. With the 3D, the figures appear to move, maybe jump and bustle, giving the same illusion that inspired creation by cavemen 32,000 years ago. Can’t say I recommend this film, but it has hidden merit, even for the non-anthropologist. Perhaps the apologist-anthropologist. I’m getting the gist of it.
Rated G, 90 Minutes
D: Werner Herzog
W: Werner Herzog
Genre: Historiography; yawn-inducing historiography
Type of person most likely to enjoy this film: Anthropologists
Type of person least likely to enjoy this film: Dropouts
