What happens when a fad doesn’t die? What if it’s like jogging, where everybody took it up in the 1970s but then people forgot to put it back down again? What’s the line between “fad” and “thing?” Like the line between disco and rock ‘n’ roll? And, fittingly enough, one of these things we associate with roller rinks, the one that died, just like the subject of today’s film.
It must be among the saddest things in the world to have to break it to a mentally impaired person that their fad is a fad. That very topic comes up in United Skates, a documentary tribute to the death of roller rinks.
Co-directors Tina Brown and Dyana Winkler were hot and bothered to point out how important roller rinks are to African-American communities. In this picture, there’s a constant mild alarm prevalent that part of African-American culture will die with roller rinks, and that is a tragedy, albeit one presented not in a motorcade of black limousines, but rolled out on very tiny wheels.
While the film does delve into the economics of roller rinkdom and the racism of select white-owned rinks [“Is there racism in roller rinks?” I hear you ask. Sugar, there’s racism in everything.] the joy of the picture is the skating itself. Select rinks and rinkmasters show off geographic team competition highlights – but all in the spirit of a love for the activity, not battle. Who knew there was a different style to go with every metro region? And the styles are indescribably wonderful: there’s the Seattle Storm, the Indiana Fever, the Orlando Miracle … wait a minute, those are WNBA teams. You’ll have to take my word for it that the styles are distinct and awesome. I can ice skate pretty well, but for an evening I wished I had mastered roller skates; you gotta admit, those guys are on a roll.
I’m thinking there ought to be writer-offs. Not quite poetry slams, actual team writer battles. Distinct styles associated with geography. Oakland would hella dominate, yo. You Got Served … papers.
United Skates is a simple film; it promised to show the plight of roller rinks, the passion for the hobby, and a bunch of cool things you could do on roller skates. It delivered on all three counts. One of my favorite things about United Skates was approach. The film told us roller rinks were dying. It stated the tragedy; it unmasked a villain or two, and then it moved on. Instead of relying on our anger and sense of injustice, the film became a celebration of skating, as if to say, “You see? You see what fun it is? Do you get what you’re missing here?” United Skates may ultimately be seeking our help in restoring these relics to Enjoyment Past, but more than anything else, the film sought audience invitation to join in on the fun before this fad officially dies. I’m sold; now if I could just hitch a ride back to 1978.
♪ Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Roll glide
We rollin’, rollin’, rollin’
Though the floor is swollen
Keep them wheels rollin’, roll glide
Not sure about whether
Should I wear suede or leather?
When I spin out I tan my hide
Hey, those dudes be dissin’
My skillz they all be missin’
I’m wearing Oaktown style with pride
Use your mo, shake that ass
Shake that ass, use your mo
Dance with me, have a blast
Roll glide♫
Not Rated, 89 Minutes
Director: Tina Brown, Dyana Winkler
Writer: Dyana Winkler
Genre: ♪Na Na Nananana Hey Hey Hey Good bye♫
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: Roller kings and queens
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Father Time
♪ Parody Inspired by “Theme from Rawhide”
