Spenser isn’t Spenser. Hawk isn’t Hawk. Pearl isn’t Pearl. And Susan doesn’t exist. Welcome to 2020 Spenser, where the wise-cracking Bostonian hard-boiled detective resembles his literary version equally as much as Trump’s imagination reflects reality. Yes, it’s that far removed.
On paper, Spenser is a PI, ex-cop, former professional boxer into literature, prose, quips, cuisine, romance, knowledge, and annoying bad guys until somebody makes a mistake. Now? Spenser is an ex-cop, ex-con, former boxer musclehead who picks fights he can’t win and has alienated an entire police force. This Spenser isn’t a PI, was jailed for assaulting a superior, has no idea what The Cloud is, and believes romance is something found in 90 second session within a locked public bathroom. But hey, he knows Boston and was a boxer, so close enough, right? Don’t even get me started on Hawk.
I’m sorry, but having read over two dozen Robert Parker novels and even an Ace Atkins Spenser Novel, I feel I’m a bit entitled to judge. Let me put it this way: the cinematic version of 6’5”Jack Reacher is more closely achieved by 5’2” Tom Cruise than Mark Walhberg emulates the Spenser I know.
Let’s put that aside for the moment and concentrate on the film because I didn’t think it was much better. As a going away “present” from jail, the Aryan brotherhood attacks Spenser. He leaves the fight with one bad guy down, several contusions, and a shiv in his abdomen. Trust me; this is the cleanest Spenser comes off from any fight in the film. Spenser went to prison for beating the tar out of his superior, Captain Boylan (Michael Gaston), and the very evening Spenser becomes free, Boylan is murdered by street thugs.
That can’t be a coincidence, can it? Sorry, it is. This isn’t that kind of film. Ex-trainer Henry Cimoli (Alan Arkin) makes Spenser room with MMA fight prodigy Hawk (Winston Duke). The joke here is that Hawk has become much closer to Spenser’s dog Pearl in the interim. Most ex-cons worry about stuff like jobs and money and security. This one doesn’t seem to care about any of that. Spenser reluctantly teaches Hawk how to box while deciding his own path lies in solving Cap’t Boylan’s murder. The latter involves running into the same cops who were pissed that Spenser beat up Boylan five years ago – hence, more ass-kickings are coming.
It’s not just that this Spenser seems to have a death wish; he also seems to have no direction. The plan is to become a truck driver and move to Arizona, but solving a murder no one wants solved pro bono becomes his calling. This Spenser strikes me a bit as an aggressive Jehovah’s Witness recruiting souls in Islamabad.
Peter Berg is so hit-and-miss as a director it’s impossible to take him seriously. Spenser Confidential is his fifth straight movie with Wahlberg if I’m counting correctly (Lone Survivor, Deepwater Horizon, Patriots Day, Mile 22) and I really enjoyed two of those films. In this one, the direction seems … lazy. As does the post production. Early on, we get a series of establishing shots after Spenser clocks Boylan – walls with barbed wire, barred windows, compound atmosphere, then finally a bird’s eye view of some sort penitentiary and big block letters appear: “PRISON.” No! You don’t say? Gee, I thought we were looking at Fenway Park. It’s kind of insulting.
Bottom line is even if I didn’t like Spenser novels, I can’t begin to pretend I’d enjoy this story. There’s no finesse or joy in the lead character, so it’s hard to back his mission, especially when he could walk away from it and maybe lead a life with a smile or two. The PI direction seems destined to end up with Boston in a wicked pissah and dead bodies both innocent and guilty.
An issue about the lead I must broach
Robert Parker’s words need no reproach
Recreating Spenser from scratch
With no pre-text match
Is a very un-novel approach
Rated R, 111 Minutes
Director: Peter Berg
Writer: Sean O’Keefe & Brian Helgeland
Genre: Messin’ with a good thing
Type of being most likely to enjoy this film: I dunno. Marky Mark fans, maybe?
Type of being least likely to enjoy this film: Anyone who has ever enjoyed a Spenser novel
